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Dear Anonymous,
Mary had a little lamb, she tied it to a pylon. 10,000 volts went up it's arse and turned it's wool to nylon.
Dear Mom and Dad,
Even Dora's parents let her explore the world with talking animals and a singing backpack, and I can't hang out with my friends after 12?
Dear transgendered female patient:,
Please stop swearing at me and threatening to report me to the Board of Medicine. You don't have a vagina or uterus, so I can't actually do a pelvic exam. And I'm an OB-Gyn: I don't do prostate exams. I also can't prescribe you birth control - because it wouldn't work
Dear friends,
Please stop joking about my boyfriend's and my sex life it's funny for 5 seconds but that's it.
Dear roommate,
WAit, wait, wait, back up. YOU are upset with ME because MY safe, where I keep all of MY personal documents and MY emergency fund, was locked and YOU couldn't get in? What POSSIBLE reason could there be for you to need to be in there, at all?!
Dear Everyone,
Please stop bullying people so that Disney and Nickelodeon can stop all those annoying commercials
Dear amazing boyfriend,
Thank you for bringing me a chocolate frog. It means so much to me but I can't decide if I want to eat it or save it to hopefully show our kids some day
Dear school staff,
MY SON IS ALLERGIC TO WHEAT! I don't care about your damn healthy eating program, if you try to feed him wheat, he could have a major reaction.
Dear people asking about my track event,
"Oh, so you jump over hurdles?"
Dear boys,
Please come to my yard even though I can not make milk shakes
Dear anyone,
When did a C become a bad grade???
Dear guys who tell me they "like less makeup",
Please wear less makeup then.
Dear neighbor,
Please , feel free to call the police to report me "attacking" your dog. I have a picture, on my phone, of your mutt biting my ankle and of the bite marks that got through my pants. I'd love to see that little rat get put down.
Dear friend who is descended from african royality,
Just because you're black doesn't justify being mean to us, or telling us our problems don't exist, and we have "easy little lives." I have a severe disability (which actually does impact my job chances too), he is physically abused, and she is so poor she's about to be evicted. Intersectionality works as the cross-section between many different ways.
Dear children's book illustrators,
Where does it say I'm an egg?
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