One day, I will be your Empress......KIDDING! That's way too much work and I'm lazy...Or am I just lying to give you a false sense of security? YOU WILL NEVER KNOW! HAHAHAHAHA >:)
Sincerely, Empress(or not) Jaliya
Please, do you really expect me to believe you made my ear bleed on purpose...
Sincerely, I may just be 15 but come on, I'm not THAT stupid.
When I named you Baggins I never thought you'd actually live up to the name
Sincerely, you died after I watched the Lord of the Rings movies for the first time
Why couldn't I be born with pink hair?
Sincerely, an anime fan
Dear 15-year-olds these days,
When I was your age, I was raising babies, not Pokemon! Get your life together, you old maids.
Sincerely, a gal from the Middle Ages.
When I ask "How are you?" or "How've you been?" and you respond with good, then ask the same of me, don't be shocked when I say evil.
Sincerely, It's I've been well.
Dear best friends who thought they were being funny,
Please remember that just because im "innocent" doesn't mean i don't know what a vibrator is
Sincerely, the horrified friend trying to figure out how to take your gift home
I'm violently throwing up and you expect me to go to a doctor's to figure out if something is wrong with me?!?!
Sincerely, Not paying 200+ dollars out of pocket just to find out what I already know
Dear Comrade Obama,
This is a capitalist society, not a communist dictatorship.
Sincerely, The Ghost of Reagan
Quit acting like every girl I date is a gold digger trying to get at my money. You think I wouldn't recognize that?
Sincerely, at least you accept your little girl for what she is
Dear Folks who wear make-up,
All in favor of changing the name from make-up to war-paint, say aye.
Dear anti-gun extremists,
So you don't want any more innocent children killed, but you think the NRA members' children should be shot so they'll know how the school shooting victims' families felt. Not only are you hypocritical, you’re despicable.
How do you live without peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?
Sincerely, a mildly culture shocked American
Dear King Arthur,
Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries.
Sincerely, Taunting French Guard