Dear 12 Year Old Boy,
Please never ever ever, tell my 8 year old girl to suck your dick and then start pulling off her skirt. I will end you.
Sincerely, You're damn right I called your momma
Dear Bill Nye,
Thanks for ruining some awesome school memories with your know-it-all, smirking views on religion.
Sincerely, I'm not religious either but just because you're a scientist doesn't mean you know all the answers o
No you're not. If you are mildly or even exteremely uncomfortable, that doesn't make it a trigger. Don't call it that, you don't need attention. #uncomfortable idea trigger
Sincerely, real victim
Dear soccer trainer who I hate,
I hate you a little less now that you got drunk out of your mind and started to sing, dance, and spill beer everywhere. The best part was when you took of your jacket and shirt.
Sincerely, the girl who hates you a little less now and has it all on video
It's bad enough when we have to ask you to bathe and comb your hair so we can breathe around you. When the judge has to ask you to dress appropriately, we've got a serious problem. Especially since your are our lawyer and your unwashed zombie look makes us lose our cause.
Sincerely, your biggest nauseated client..
Dear Drawing Skills,
My doodles are turned into beautiful drawings, but my attempted masterpieces turn into illustrations not even worth the title of doodle?
Sincerely, people are expecting something better with my artwork after they've seen my textbooks...
Dear boyfriend of 2 years,
The fact that you didn't even ACKNOWLEDGE our anniversary has me angry and disappointed in you, so don't play that "what did I do" card when I give you the cold shoulder tomorrow. Everyone even reminded you for a week.
Sincerely, you seriously fucked up.
You may identify as male, but you are still biologically female, so no, I'm not being bigoted when I can't sign you up for a prostate exam. The system will literally not allow me to.
Sincerely, the "bitch" receptionist
Please shut up , he is yours
Sincerely, paranoid girl whose afraid to lose him
Dear strange child,
Please don't eat the crayons just because the label says they're nontoxic...
Sincerely, concerned adults
Dear people who assume all Americans are racist,
The fact that you generalize and stereotype us all makes you as racist as you're claiming we are.
Sincerely, an American girl who just wishes we could live and let live
Dear anti-military people,
Please support our soldiers. They are fighting for YOUR freedom! Thank them for rising their lives for our country!
Sincerely, Proud military supporter
Dear People who are staring,
Please stop staring at my best friend and I. It is perfectly normal to blast Disney tunes from the convertable with the top down.
Sincerely, two 20 year olds who don't want to grow up.
Dear smallest guy at football tryouts,
I'm so proud of you. No matter what I know you can do this. Dont listen to what everyone else says, I have so much faith in you. It'll take some work but I know you've got it in you.
Sincerely, girl who knows you can do this