Dear Bronys that go see my Mom for their doctor,
Please stop going to her, she comes home everyday very confused about humanity.
Sincerely, her 16 year old daughter that has to explain everything to her
Dear house/pet sitter,
Please explain the neighbor's complaints of loud swearing all night, loud music, and shouting. Apparently she didn't come talk to you because when she came during the day you were on the roof with your face painted and shouting, and you freaked her out. According to her boyfriend at night you ride my son's bike howling at the moon. On the bright side, the house is in one piece and the animals are happy.
Sincerely, I let you watch my children all the time?
Dear woman plopping some bombs in the stall next to me,
Sincerely, girl loudly crinkling her plastic shopping bag.
Please let me comfort you right now. The child in your stomach is mine too.
Sincerely, I thought I was going to get to move on with my life until last night
Dear (some) black people,
It really isn't the white people's fault; try working hard.
Sincerely, a self made black person
Dear other kids in my grade,
Please understand that I honestly don't care how many times you say it I do not need a boyfriend
Sincerely, a very annoyed 12 year old
Dear friend I walked in the bush with,
You were wearing shorts and a tank top. I was wearing a long sleeved shirt and jeans. Neither of us had insect repellent, and you complained you were itchy.
Sincerely, but how the heck do you end up with 3 mosquito bites while I've got over 40?!
Please stay strong and remember you aren't in this alone. We know how it feels to be targeted by hate groups and such, we've built their railroads and dams for them and then they says we "should go back to where we came from" before attacking us and hurling insults. Then once we started getting use to the US, they come back and start calling us Communists because the people across the pond who happen to look like us are Communists. Stay strong and hopeful, I promise you that not everyone in America is a racist, misinformed bigot :)
Dear stores near me,
Please start stocking blue birthday girl balloons and superhero bikes for girls. My soon to be seven year old twin sisters hate pink and love Hulk and Spiderman. I'll get them boy bikes, but it'd be cool if they could have the huge blue helium balloons you have for boys.
Sincerely, an older brother
Dear new mothers,
Please get your infant child away from me.
Sincerely, not all women want to hold your baby and I hate kids.
Dear little kids,
Please stop saying "I quit" before I tag you. It defeats the whole purpose of the game.
Sincerely, been playing tag for over an hour now...
Please add some filter to catch these "My uncle earns $95065 a month click scam link" posts? Surely the fact that they are in bold, using the same message, with obviously suspect links, weird borders etc means something can automatically pick up on the spam.
Sincerely, there must be some way to stop them
Dear government taxes,
What's the point in getting a higher paid job when you will just take over 30% of my increase?
Sincerely, An angry girl with too much taken out of her paycheck.
Please stop keeping unhealthy food in the house. Yes, I understand that willpower is important. But it is really hard to have it when there is tempting food right under your nose, all the time.
Sincerely, your daughter who's dealing with a weight problem.