I was wondering if you could help me find the "friend zone".
Sincerely, a boy loner.
Dear Lord Voldemort,
Sincerely, The Boy Who Lived
Please give me back my heart.
Sincerely, Ex-girlfriend with a hole in her chest.
Was it awkward when Andy was getting dressed?
Sincerely, Just curious
Dear toilet paper,
Please stop complaining that you have the worst job. I don't want to argue with you about this anymore.
Dear friend who lost her virginity to a guy she's been dating less than a week,
Really? In the woods?
Sincerely, Now I know why I'm waiting for marriage...
Dear North Korea,
I meant put the take-out in the microwave when i said to nuke the Chinese.
Sincerely, Kim Jong Un
Welcome to the no-nose club!
Dear Nearly Headless Nick,
No, you are still not welcome into our club!
Sincerely, Tyrion, Vincent Van Gogh, Darth Vader and the rest of the Missing Parts Club.
You should have put one of your Horcruxes into my ex-boyfriend's ego.
Sincerely, It is freakin' indestructible!
Please re-send my acceptance letter to Hogwarts. The owl must have gotten lost.
Sincerely, A hopeful wizard bored of the muggle world
Please recognize that President Obama has done a great job in the face of the trials and tribulations you put in front of him.
Sincerely, a Democrat proud of our president
Dear people waiting for the zombie virus,
I'm already here! The only problem is that there's already cure...
Dear X Box,
Please give me my boyfriend back.
Sincerely, A gamer's girlfriend