SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear Ciaran,
We had a good run. Your time in a coma was hard for everyone. When you were pronounced braindead we all cried. but when they realized you were an organ donor they prepped you for a surgery, which ended up saving 6 lives.
Dear Mother in FredMeyer,
When your toddler ran off in excitement and you ran after him, I was sincerely worried you'd spank him once you caught up with him. You didn't, you simply took his hand and walked back to your cart with him. You restored my faith in today's parents.
Dear overreacting "friend",
Please stop freaking out every time any of joke around with you, in case you haven't noticed that is how we are all treating each other. You told us you wanted to be just like us...
Dear Starbucks employee,
Please tell me why abbreviation is such a long word
Dear College Board,
Are you lowering your standards? How did I pass the AP Environmental Science exam when I wrote a joke instead of one of the essays? How did I pass the English Composition one when I didn't even understand the second prompt?
Dear people who insist the hobbits could have used the eagles,
Mordor's atmosphere is poisonous until Sauron is vanquished. The eagles only came as a favor, they're not pets. The Nazgul on their fel beasts would have attacked, or the orcs would have shot the eagles and or the hobbits down. The point of the quest was stealth and eagles are anything but.
Dear rest of the world,
Just to tell you no one in Australia says "put a shrimp on the barbie" For one we call them prawns!
Dear men of the world,
Did you know relative to its size the barnicle has the largest penis of all beings on earth
Dear guy friend,
I could handle the friends-with-benefits situation. However, now that you've started cuddling with me and kissing me, I'm confused big time...
Dear Kronk,
Please WRONG LEVER
Dear people who care far too much about people's backgrounds,
I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are.
Dear keyboard,
Please move the : and the ; buttons farther apart.
Dear Mood,
For once, can you please not put me in such a bad mood when I think about how lonely I am when I'm alone? Because it's starting to really get to me.
Dear girl I make awkward eye contact with,
I'm going to smile at you in the hall on monday, okay?
Dear cultural stereotypes,
The French did not give up when the Nazis invaded during WWII; they started a resistance and became the symbol of independence. The Polish have produced such brilliants as Curie, Chopin, and Copernicus. Kazakhstan has one of the most modern capitals on the planet. Only 6% of terrorists are Muslim. Africa contains seven of the 40 nations worldwide that have been stable since their independence, something that no North American nation can say, and almost no Western European countries.
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