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Dear people that write "bestfriend",
Hello. My name is Señor Spacebar. You killed proper syntax.
Dear boyfriend,
Thank you so much for having a garbage can in your bathroom. It spares me a lot of embarrassment.
Dear classmate,
I love how you are so happy about becoming a dad, despite you being only 19. I love how it motivates you to work very hard for your degree, and don't let anyone tell you that your child has no future just because you became a parent so young. You'll make a great dad, despite everything you've ever been trough and even despite your mild autism.
Dear teen mom at my school,
Your baby is adorable and I am so proud of you for sticking with this no matter the ridicule, hardships, and difficulties you knew you would face. I think you'll be a great mom, and your boyfriend will be a great dad. So what if it just happened a little earlier in life?
Dear World,
In the next 100 years, the word 'politician' will become one of the most offensive insults ever.
Dear Students,
Please stop using the word "extremely." It's not going to help you get what you want.
Dear Star Wars fans,
A suggestion: Next time you got to an airport, cover your luggage so that it shows a picture of R2-D2 and C-3PO. Then when TSA asks to take your luggage, you know what to say.
Dear wanting to ban the r word makes you an idiot,
Please realize that medical retardation is NO LONGER politically correct
Dear Friends,
Please stop judging me for not freaking out about boys.
Dear body,
How did I manage to get tendinitis in my hip by walking across my college campus at age 21?
Dear guys,
If in every party you go you are expecting to hook up with a girl and you would do it everytime if you had the chance, why do you call girls bad words when they do the same?
Dear school,
Have I mentioned how little I care?
Dear bullies,
you won
Dear "socially awkward" girls in my class,
You are NOT socially awkward. You each have 20 friends plus, people follow you during lunch so they can talk with you, and you always have at least 5 people to pick from when the teacher tells us to pick partners. Stop saying you're antisocial or awkward or a forever alone. It's quite offensive.
Dear Brother,
When you came home with your girlfriend, everyone knew you were gonna keep her when they saw you two playing video games, eating chinese food, and looking for comic book references in your favorite shows. We joke how she is your "snow bunny", but don't give her up, please
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