Dear Man in the Grocery Store,
Please don't wear yoga pants ever again.
Sincerely, a scarred teenage girl
Dear people who are against gay parents,
Last time I checked, Timone and Pumba did an excellent job raising me.
Sincerely, Simba
Dear world,
If everyone's always complaining about doing all the work for a group project, who's the person not actually doing it?
Sincerely, think about it...
Dear Facebook users,
There is a simple reason to why there is no dislike button
Sincerely, it promotes bullying
Dear people who wonder,
Heels were invented by butchers who didn't want to step in the filth of their shop.
Sincerely, thought you should know.
Dear Tiny sweet baby of mine,
You are, literally, smaller than your daddy's foot, how do you poop so much?
Sincerely, confused mommy
Dear Siri,
Do you keep a record of all my questions? Because I ask some pretty dumb things.
Sincerely, where does ham come from?
Dear Parents,
Please knock before you come into my room because sometimes I dance around in my underwear.
Sincerely, Dancing Queen
Dear world,
If I love myself, I'm conceited. If I don't love myself, I'm an attention whore. WTF
Sincerely, Not sure what you want.
Dear people who complain about the government,
A government with the power to give you everything you want has the power to take away everything you need...
Sincerely, Think wisely
Dear "roses are red, violets are blue",
False. Violets are violet by nature, and roses, depending on their genotype, can be a variety of colors.
Sincerely, Sheldon Cooper.
Dear pervy guys staring at me as I eat my Popsicle,
*CRUNCH*
Sincerely, oh I even broke the Popsicle stick.
Dear Fat Amy,
Thank you for having lots of pride and no shame.
Sincerely, curvy girls of the world
Dear Cinderella,
If your shoe fits perfectly, then how come it falls off?
Sincerely, Confused...
Dear nose,
Please remember that my physics final is not the appropriate time to turn into Old Faithful.
Sincerely, Why do you contain so much blood?
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