Please know that I will never forgive you for making my childhood/teenage years a living hell. I was the best child I could be, but you still put me down.
Sincerely, And people wonder why I want to move out for college, even if I have to live in a trashy apartment.
Dear vegetarians who try to force their choice on everyone,
Please realize that your diet is your choice, and you don't need to lament when someone eats meat while around you.
Sincerely, vegetarian who realizes that I've made a decision for myself, not the rest of the world.
We like sandwiches too!
Dear Jobs I applied for,
Please think about getting back to me sooner. I found a better job while waiting, and 3 months is a dang long time to wait to hear that I wasn't accepted.
Sincerely, I hope you go out of business
Dear life ,
Why can't you have background music?
Sincerely, then I might understand what's going on all the time
Just because I freak out when you walk in my room doesn't mean I'm hiding something.
Sincerely, Your 16-year-old daughter that isn't doing drugs, but rather just wants some privacy
Dear People who are mean to fat people.,
Please dont tell fat people that they jiggle when they run. They know that, thats why they're running!
Sincerely, BFF to the jiggly people
Please leave the diamonds to me
Sincerely, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
At least We Have Doodles
Dear verbal communication skills,
Why don't you ever work properly when I need you to?!
Sincerely, frustrated shut-in
Dear Supreme Court,
Sincerely, non-heterosexual couples
WEll, it only took you three weeks, but you finally settled on a proper clean-up schedule. And, suprise, suprise, it is the exact schedule we were using before you came here. Glad to see you can be trained.
Sincerely, maybe listen to your employees, eh?
Dear ex boyfriend ,
Acne cleared up, lost 25 lbs, and learning how to box.
Sincerely, your "fat and ugly" ex girlfriend you just whistled at
Please Stop singing "Everyday I'm suffering."
Sincerely, It's "Everyday I'm shuffling!"
Dear friend who keeps telling me to donate to her causes,
According to you, I'm in the top 15% of richest people globally. However, that does not mean I can afford to go giving it away. Different countries have different currencies, different economies and different prices. What I get may make me wealthy by comparison to the average farmer in Ghana, but here I'm barely above the poverty line. Perhaps you should turn your attention to your own back yard before you go saving the world.
Sincerely, having trouble feeding myself, let alone anyone else.